


Honey We Ran Out Of Condoms and Cookie Crisps

by broken_machines



Series: This Is Home [2]
Category: Angels & Airwaves, Blink-182
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Fluff, Grocery Shopping, M/M, Married Life, Romance, Schmoop
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-03
Updated: 2018-12-03
Packaged: 2019-09-06 00:02:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,190
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16821112
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/broken_machines/pseuds/broken_machines
Summary: "It's the fifth time in two days Tom tries to convince Mark of the impending doom of an alien domination"Groceries and soft PDA ensue.





	Honey We Ran Out Of Condoms and Cookie Crisps

"But I'm telling you, this guy is the real fucking deal. It's legit, babe– they're all facts. You just have to open your mind more and embrace the truth that's right in your face."

"Tom, just because he's from the DOD or like, created fucking area 51 doesn't mean it's all true," Mark argues. It's the fifth time in two days Tom tries to convince Mark of the impending doom of an alien domination.

"But I showed you the video clips!" Tom whines in a voice too high to be of a grown man's.

He walks through the automatic sliding doors of Kroger's and makes his way to the carts. He considers briefly taking one of the mini kiddie carts, but it's too short for a guy as tall as him and his bad back decides against it– not Mark's disapproving gaze.

Tom strolls through the first aisles with the cart. He's leaning and pushing it with his forearms atop the handle and Mark links an arm through Tom's, walking by his side.

"Honey, aliens won't come down and eat your ass."

"But what if I wanted them to?"

"They'll think your dick is bent and ugly as fuck and leave," Mark says. He unlinks his arm and raids the coffee section while Tom stops the cart.

Mark thinks his husband has finally stopped rambling about his obsession, but this is rarely the case.

"Do you think when aliens hover past Earth they roll their fucking windows up?" Tom says half jokingly.

Mark bursts laughing and lays a glass jar of beans into their cart. "I mean yeah, probably."

"You admit it! You admitted they're real," the younger gasps and points a judging finger at his face.

The other's smile only widens as they keep walking aisles.

Mark can believe that there must be _something_ out there, but he just won't verbally address this. He loves poking fun at Tom, but also engages in conversation sometimes when watching reruns of Ancient Aliens together, or every other dumb documentary Mark's attention accidentally draws on when they're on the couch.

He knows there's something, but he also knows it's funny as hell watching Tom's face get frustrated. It can even sometimes lead to really good, angry sex.

Tom turns to the dairy section and Mark shakes his head at him.

"No, in the _hypothetical case_ they exist, aliens would obviously roll their windows up. 'Cause they know you live here and they don't want to be near your ugly dick"

"Hey, that's _mean_ " Tom pouts and opens one of the fridges. He closes the door with one hand, balancing a Ben & Jerry's and Starbucks ice cream in the other. "Never make fun of someone with a small, bent weiner."

They carry all the necessary dairy items in the cart and Mark suddenly remembers, "ooh, the condoms!" quite a bit too loud. They earn a gaze from an elder woman and Tom flashes an apologetic smile before he's dragged off by his husband.

Tom finds himself linking his fingers with Mark's unconsciously while they look at the products. Something's missing.

"They don't have the alien glowy type?"

"I guess they ran out," Mark says. "Fuck, what do we buy now?"

"Maybe we bought them all," Tom giggles. "How about these?"

He picks up a small box of condoms of a brand they've never tried.

"Cool, it's got little patterns on it. Like those dumb crap cycles."

" _Crop circles_ ," Tom rolls his eyes.

He takes two boxes and tosses them, landing atop the box of Eggo's sitting in the cart. As he strolls by, he also grabs a tube of pink strawberry lube even if he hates it, but only keeps purchasing it because Mark loves it. It honestly just tastes like crap, like jelly gone bad.

He doesn't get the chance to exit the aisle as a couple in their twenties approach Tom with huge smiles. He knew he wasn't paranoid when he though someone was looking at him from the aisle ahead.

They end up chatting for a couple of minutes where Tom shines charming smiles at both of them and cracks a couple of jokes here and there, and something tugs in Mark's gut.

He knows he shouldn't but he's sure feeling his anger boiling up. Not entirely towards Tom, he can't help being naturally charming, which leads him to think why Tom would pick him over anyone else.

Mark doesn't have boobs, he's not skinny, not muscular (even if he tries in their gym), he's not young, and their interests don't always meet. Why? Why would he, a rockstar, marry someone as basic as Mark?

So he chooses to channel his anger towards the two beautiful young adults. Anger, out of pure jealousy that is.

After a few pictures, they hug Tom one last time and thank him like they owed their life to this man.

"You really _are_ giant," the attractive girl says, amused by his height.

 _Of course he is_ , Mark thinks bitterly. He holds Tom's hand to remind him he exists, and this draws attention to the couple.

"Mark, hey!" the boy says, apparently genuinely happy to have met him.

The older offers a fake smile out of politeness.

"And this is my hubby, Mark" Tom presents, wrapping an arm around him. He knows well how much Mark dreads the word and how cheesy he thinks it sounds but Tom always enjoys making fun of him.

"Right, we'll leave you two alone now. It's truly been a pleasure meeting you guys. We'll definitely come see you at Warped this summer," the boy says, holding the girl's hand.

They walk the opposite way with smiles etched on their faces and occasionally looking back to glimpse at Tom and Mark again.

It's a rarity for fans to approach Tom in this manner. They're just another normal neighbor in the area.

Sure, they live in a private neighborhood on a steep hill that looks down at San Diego, but they still frequent places where every fan in the area knows they can be found. It's a good normal rockstar life, and Tom loves it. Still he finds it strange for people to be this excited to meet him at mundane places, but he plays along and appreciates their love.

Whereas, Mark doesn't. He keeps silent all the way to the cereal aisle. He knows holding these grudges are very immature of him but he can't help but feel quite sad after remembering anyone could take Tom away from him.

"Baby, what's wrong?" Tom has this thing for immediately realizing Mark's mood changes but not his reasons.

Mark only squints his blue eyes up at him in annoyance. Has he not been obvious enough? He's nice enough to give Tom a hint.

" _You really are giant_ " Mark mocks in an exaggerated girly voice. He makes kissy noises at Tom and turns around, annoyed this is rather amusing the guy, and suddenly Count Chocula seems more interesting than Tom's laughter.

He stocks on eleven different cereal boxes– they're generally lazy to do groceries too often and this is what runs out the fastest because they consume it regularly.

As he turns around to place everything in the cart, he hears Tom's giggling subside, although the asshole is still smiling.

There's barely no one at nine in the morning on a Monday so Tom thinks it's safe to wrap himself around Mark and hug his waist from behind without worrying of too much PDA.

"Babe," Tom stretches out the syllable. He places his lips right behind his ear and the older one feels weak. It's not fair to be this charming.

"They just support me and my band. You know how much I love you," he says softly, holding him in his arms and swaying them side to side calmly.

Mark can only close his eyes. He has to focus very hard on keeping his angry stance, because as soon as he feels Tom's soft lips pecking his neck he realizes he really does love this man with everything.

He's never been angry at him for more than a day, not even the time when it was raining heavily and Tom forgot to pick him up from work. He ended up taking a cab that day, drenched, and came home to Tom sleeping on the couch with the TV casting flickered light on his tired face, and a half empty Cheetos bag on his chest.

What's worse is, Tom has never been genuinely angry at him before. He's always smiling and teasing when he's not in his philosophical thoughtful and artsy state of superior mind or whatever bullshit. He radiates love all around him and he's a highly positive guy. It's worse because it makes Mark feel like the bitchy husband he is.

He lets himself be embraced by the strong arms on his waist and doesn't shrug him off like when he's stubborn and throwing tantrums.

Mark draws his head back and rests it on Tom's shoulder. He feels his lips tenderly trace down his neck. Gentle, like a feather. His scent is inebriating and he suddenly feels safe.

Tom is sometimes dumb with words, so if he can't tell him how much he loves him, he'll show him.

Mark turns around in their embrace and wraps his arms around his neck. He doesn't dare look into Tom's eyes, he's still feeling quite gloomy, so he just rests this head on the taller man's chest.

He mutters something but his words are muffled by his shirt.

"What was that?"

"I said she was kinda hot," Mark repeats himself.

"No she wasn't," Tom says reassuringly.

"Her breasts were the size of Florida. They might as well emancipate from her body and go off to create their own nation."

Tom laughs and hides a kiss in his hair.

"Florida isn't even that big. Guy was a little cute though," Tom tests. He earns a dirty look from Mark and a soft punch on the shoulder.

"No he wasn't! His face was ugly... and I have way cooler hair. Besides, his dick is probably brown and ugly,"

"Hey but you _like_ ugly dicks..."

"I only like _your_ ugly dick," Mark says soft and earnestly and the other takes it as the most romantic thing ever.

Tom draws him impossibly closer by his middle.

"I love you," he whispers sweetly. He closes his eyes and rubs his nose against Mark's and he doesn't even care if it's the gayest shit ever. He wants him to know he really does mean it every time.

Tom honestly doesn't know where Mark's insecurity comes from, seeing as he's the pudgy and weird one in the relationship. He knows well that there's so many secretaries at the record company Mark works at, but he's not moved by this knowledge. He trusts Mark well enough, and he's as open minded to understand that he can't hold him back if he were ever to leave him.

Mark is standing on his tiptoes and they briefly kiss in the aisle until they hear a cart pass near by. Mark unwraps his arms from his husband's neck but he doesn't take his blue eyes from Tom's stare. They're full of life like they always are, and a spark has returned back to Mark's eyes. Tom feels accomplished.

They finish their trip to the store by strolling to the fruit section. They weigh everything in their respective baggies and Mark juggles an apple and two oranges. Tom ends up throwing him a pear to see if he can handle it, but he's clumsy and lasts a second. All the fruits fall to the floor and they ditch the sector laughing.

As they're passing by the meat and frozen foods section for the second time today, Mark quickly sneaks a couple of Tom's favorite sushi rolls into their cart.

Even though he isn't vegan anymore, he still refuses to eat any type of dead animal more than twice a week. Tom smiles as he realizes he's doing this for him and takes his hand, intertwining their fingers.

As soon as they arrive at the checkout line they realize their system crashed and there's only three available cashiers, causing three lines of at least ten people. They don't have fifteen items or less and Mark groans as they stand in the longest line, but still smiles up at Tom.

When their smiles and gazes meet, Mark immediately snuggles into Tom's hoodie and buries his head in his chest. They hug and slowly sway from side to side in their embrace.

Tom closes his eyes and presses his lips to the top of Mark's head. He stays like that while softly humming the melody of Longtime Sunshine by Weezer. He's recently gotten off a tour with the band, and fuck if he can't get that song out of his head.

Mark visibly relaxes in his arms and sighs. He doesn't care if anyone stares at them or silently judges. Right now, in this moment it's just Tom and Mark. And it's the only thing he will ever need.


End file.
